What's the Value of the Truth?
The supreme beauty of the honest truth
Late last week I had a strange text exchange with a professional acquaintance. This person had offered to connect me with his contact, whose company is hiring for a role I’m interested in and qualified for.
They asked how they should present the gap in my employment history to their contact. I was confused, as this person knew I had been laid off as part of a company downsizing, with severance and no fault of my own.
I suggested he offer the real story to his contact. Honesty has always been my preference, ever since a handful of childhood and adolescent entanglements with lying and fabricating stories had quickly caught up to me. I learned that I’d rather tell the truth and move on, than have to keep track of my fibs so I could keep my story consistent.
They replied that they wanted to "support me in the best possible way" and were trying to coordinate with me. I reiterated that the job market has been challenging, not just for me, and that I've been actively networking, upskilling, and applying to relevant opportunities. Though seven months have passed, I have no other explanation for the gap.
I couldn't understand why the real story would be a problem.
Then it dawned on me that perhaps a simpler, more convenient explanation would be preferable—that I had taken time off to care for an aging relative. This story is neater, tidier, and ultimately inconsequential. I told my contact that if they thought it best to keep it vague, I was fine with that, and they agreed.
This was a lesson in spin and relative truths. While I did travel to Florida during my time off to see family and prepare our home for two hurricanes, no one was actually sick. I likely wouldn't have quit my job even if someone had been. Both explanations could be true, but as usual, I defaulted to the honest truth rather than a crafted story.
Perhaps that makes me naïve, but I've always believed the truth is about respecting one's audience. Honesty and integrity are paramount to building a reliable reputation. Every instance of intentional deception erodes trustworthiness.
I also accept that there are instances where spin is critical, when circumstances are complex or some details are “TMI”. But lies and deception are less necessary when one’s intent is honest and actions are in good faith. Mistakes and missteps are bound to happen, but haven’t we learned throughout history that the truth typically comes to light anyway? Isn’t it better to come clean up front and let the dust settle rather than attempting to cover one’s tracks?
This episode brought to mind the world we face now—one where truth is relative, trust in organizations and institutions is crumbling, and it’s become harder to separate objective truth from sensationalism and bias. Those who control the media platforms and their algorithms control the narrative, and the entire system feels like a runaway train of misinformation (the facts are wrong without intent), disinformation (false information with intent to deceive), and propaganda.
And it feels harder and harder, like Superman, to stand in the way of the speeding locomotive. Yet despite its inconvenience or messiness or ugliness, there will always be something beautiful about the honest truth. Every person’s version of events will naturally vary, but as close as we can get to objective truth—this is where light lives. And hope. And love. And compassion. And connection.
Is there any other way to truly live? Are we here on this earth to be witness to the range of true human nature, or to live in blissful bubbles of ignorance and detachment? To live our lives in fear, in distrust, and in scarcity? To pledge allegiance to businessmen instead of democratic ideals and science?
I can’t, and I won’t.
What do you think?
This leads us to our next story…
Good People
Carmela is my housekeeper. She's been cleaning my apartment for several years, and we've become close. She's an immigrant from Central America, having moved to Los Angeles to start a family and provide her kids and her extended family abroad a better life. In many ways, she reminds me of my own mother.
Understandably, Carmela has been terrified lately about the new federal immigration policies and practices being rolled out—a campaign of blame and scapegoating on immigrants. She dreads the day that ICE agents might show up and haul her away from her family and her life here.
The truth is that our country's problems aren't because of immigrants crowding out American citizens or taking more than their fair share. Most immigrants are doing jobs that few others want—cleaning bathrooms, picking crops, working in fast food. While there may be some bad actors, this is a human problem, not a racial or ethnic one.
Our societal problems stem from greed at the top—greed for money, power, and influence. This country was founded by and for immigrants, and has been transformed time and again by people who've come here to work hard and enjoy the benefits of American society—a free press, social safety net, access to education, and an honest government.
Yet today, we're seeing those foundational pillars knocked down in favor of profit and mass manipulation.
Even as I've had to cut back on expenses during my own period of unemployment, I can't bring myself to stop having Carmela visit once a month. She does excellent work, and I feel a sense of responsibility towards her. Despite my own financial constraints, I take comfort in being able to share what I can.
Carmela and I spoke at length yesterday, and despite the frightening climate, I told her that we must stick together, support one another, and do what we can in our own spheres to be kind, look out for our neighbors and colleagues, and share resources, information and encouragement.
*her name has been changed for her protection
Okay…on to lighter topics :)
Saturday Night Live
This year is SNL’s 50th anniversary, and there’s been a ton of interesting and fun content surrounding its semicentennial.
My favorite so far are two YouTube clips. One from Architectural Digest—a tour of Studio 8H where SNL is filmed (above) and the other, a recording of the very first SNL aired on October 11, 1975. It’s amazing to watch how the show has evolved, and how it’s remained strikingly similar, over 50 years and 167 cast members.
Collage of the Week
Hierarchy of Needs, 2024
That’s all folks. Happy belated Valentine’s Day. I love you. -A