The joys of borrowing
Enjoy variety, save money, and build community
Can borrowing something be as satisfying as owning it?
In my experience, the answer is yes. I have found borrowing to be a far richer experience than owning in many cases and for many reasons.
Borrowing things, spaces, and pets not only affords one the novelty of something new and different without the longer-term commitment of ownership, it also builds deep connection.
We live in a society designed for personal accumulation and consumption, and yet it’s clear that consumerism has considerable downsides, due to negative environmental and social impacts—which are coming to a point rather rapidly.
Individual consumers may be small actors but their combined actions and attitudes toward accumulation dictate the pace at which we consume as a population inhabiting a planet. I believe we must embrace different models for consumption, and entertain entirely new (or renewed) paradigms about physical ownership as a necessity for everyone and everything.
Wider acceptance of sharing or jointly owning possessions is one way forward.
As I enter mid-life aged 36—not young but not yet old—and I reflect on my own somewhat fraught experience with money and finances, it occurred to me that I’ve made a life of borrowing other people’s things, enjoying them, and then giving them back, and it’s been really rewarding.
We accept the function of renting (apartments and homes), leasing (cars), and the logic of short-term rentals à la Airbnb. But a surprising number of elements in our lives present great opportunities for sharing resources or durable goods, interacting as a community, and reducing overall consumption, which is key if we plan to exist on planet Earth for the foreseeable future.
Borrowing’s main appeal is that it’s low-risk, high-reward, and requires none of the commitment of full-time personal ownership. Commitment can mean physical and psychological, not just financial.
Years ago, I sold the car I was driving in order to fund my move to California. I already had a track-record as a reliable pet sitter, so when I became a Proud Pedestrian, I often parlayed that trust into pet-sitting, house-sitting, and car-borrowing all in one.
Bacardi the German Shepherd and I cruised around SF in Aaron’s BMW. When I moved to Los Angeles, I met Shaun and his dog Dudley (portrayed below). I quickly became a fixture in his car and was tickled sleeping in his ultra-modern hilltop ADU in Highland Park.
In exchange for drop-off and pick-up from the airport, I’ve borrowed Jeremiah’s Hyundai hybrid and Marcus’ Tesla. Last year I flew to Tampa to watch Stephen’s dog Jack and enjoyed driving his Volvo and sleeping in his loft.
Temporary stewardship is like getting a new car every other weekend. Or playing with a new puppy every other month. It’s a fleeting but sweet upset to the status quo, and I get paid instead of spending money.
This continued ability to borrow and enjoy other people’s possessions only works because I have a spotless driving record, a genuine love of animals, and a conscientiousness when it comes to other people’s belongings. And I’m single with no dependents.
I see all my borrowing experiences as dry runs for my own eventual ownership of vehicles and pets and homes, but I’m in no hurry and have no particular order in mind.
What’s the rush?
For someone who enjoys cars but owns no cars, I’ve enjoyed sampling many over the last decade, with nearly none of the ownership and operating costs.
One pro tip for borrowing vehicles: always refill with gas or charge, get a quick wash, and in cases of longer-term borrowing, offer to cover insurance for that period.
The same is true for my pet-sitting. For someone who loves animals but has none, I’ve enjoyed being a daddy to many, without the codependency, home destruction, care costs, etc. I’m overjoyed when they arrive and I’m overjoyed when they depart.
Throughout history there have always been examples of peer-to-peer borrowing. The public library is a time-tested example of how borrowing resources can work. Now you can borrow all kinds of media from libraries, even things like museum passes.
With technology’s great advances, new methods of borrowing and sharing are more possible than ever. I recently used Turo to borrow a car in my neighborhood and Peerspace to reserve a private home for a photoshoot, and had seamless experiences with both.
Some things don’t lend themselves to borrowing, of course.
Personal effects, and things like clothing are less appealing to share. But why do any of us need mountains of books? Personal subscriptions to magazines? Yuck.
Here are some things we’re accustomed to personally owning, that I think we could figure out how to share more of, among friends, families, and social networks, and probably consumer fewer overall:
Cars
recreational vehicles and watercraft
Homes
2nd homes and vacation rentals
Pets
sporting/camping/exercise equipment and gear
tools and hardware
certain gadgets and electronics like gaming consoles
Luggage
Art, decor, and plants
I know this is like all the fun stuff.
But we could! Why not a jointly owned utility vehicle? A shared collection of memorabilia?
I’m just saying. We must each embrace the impermanence of life, and embrace a new paradigm of appreciation over accumulation.
We still have things of our own. Private, special, sentimental. But much of the enjoyment and satisfaction of life is sampling a bit of this and a bit of that. Mixing up the routine while maintaining a balanced foundation. And not necessarily having to make full commitments to the costs and responsibilities of owning everything we appreciate or want to enjoy.
Borrowing has a certain appeal. It blends newness and novelty with built-in community, a sense of responsibility, and an obvious financial unburdening.
We should try it more.
A big thank you to my editor Susan who has helped my writing immensely over the years.
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