Spiritual Wealth

And other musings from a late 30s human man

This past weekend marked my most recent complete trip around the sun. 38 years ago on 2/22/1987, I sprung forth onto this crazy amazing rock and started learning.

I don’t feel older but I do feel wiser. I understand more about the world now, more about myself, and have more nuanced views on what makes life worth living.

I’ve realized that life is so much bigger than the things we collect or the spaces we build for ourselves or the seemingly insurmountable messes we find ourselves in, personally and collectively.

Life is about the journey and all of its deviations. Forward, backward. Blindsides and shocks. Throughout life, no matter what has already occurred and what may come to pass, the only things we have genuine control over are our attitude—how we interpret what happens to and around us—and the community we keep close.

The last year hasn’t been especially easy for me. I was laid off from my six figure job at a time when economics are uncertain. Our entire world faces a reckoning at the intersection of advanced technology, extreme politics, and existential changes in weather and habitability. Our entire world order is in flux.

Yet, deep in my heart, I feel rich. Richer than I’ve ever felt in my entire life.

I believe now that unseen universal forces (the hand of God?) nudged me into this next chapter of my life because I was stagnant—bored with my routine, not especially in touch with my spirit, and self-medicating with screens and consumption. I had inklings of a different life, but I was too comfortable to make a change on my own.

Without stable employment, I’ve had to retrain certain muscles (like how to be on a tight budget). I’ve learned a tough lesson about financial prudence. I haven’t purchased anything unnecessary or self-indulgent in eight months (and counting), and honestly haven’t really missed “shopping”, which feels like a telling revelation.

Nevertheless, I found my way into cat daddy-hood last year. In fact the Cat Distribution System brought me two matching sisters—Emily and Andy. I also purchased a car for the first time ever, a car I’ve loved since I was in middle school. It might be slowly falling apart, but I love its analog simplicity.

This year also marked my first real foray into meditation. Through stillness and reflection, I’ve learned that prayer and surrender are potent paths to feeling lighter.

I don’t believe we are in total control of our circumstances—some things still depend on uncontrollable forces. Instead, we’re each born into challenges, be they familial, physical, or mental, and a path. Our job is to understand them, love and appreciate them, and learn from them in order to grow.

So while things feel so crazy right now and I haven’t the slightest clue what the future holds, I feel like I’ve unlocked some core truth about life in the midst of one of my most challenging personal chapters…that it isn’t about how comfortable we can make ourselves or how many toys we can buy and distract ourselves with, or what our resume says. It’s how we manage what’s right in front of us with our attitude and our willingness to embrace a loving attitude.

It isn’t about being ahead, it’s about being real.

All throughout my life, I’ve loved loving other people, and that seemed to circle right back to me this past weekend on my birthday. I invited a solid group of 20 or so friends to meet up at a bar. It was all the good ones, the fellow kind spirits and creatives and dreamers and sharers. All I wanted for my birthday was to be present with my friends—and as always, connect good people to one another.

And somehow I got twenty people to show up for me?

It wasn’t only about the size of the group, but the gestures and words and the smiles they brought with them. It was the thoughtful books and handmade ceramics and the fresh sourdough and homemade Milano cookies.

Family and friends from afar sent letters and flowers and things for the cats. Another friend always sends me a new notebook right when I’m about to fill up the last one.

How could I not feel rich?

Last week was a really intense series of events. I delivered plants to the Frieze art fair for Felix at The Juicy Leaf, brought my cats to the Vet to be spayed (poor girls!), participated in two interviews, and drove down to Laguna Beach and back Friday for lunch with a dear friend and mentor, in miserable gridlock traffic.

All told, it reminded me that life keeps coming, good, bad, annoying, and blissful. Our jobs are to honor and appreciate all the moments, and bring our serene loving grace to all of it—ourselves, our communities, our world. Even if it’s hard.

I think the old adage is right. When life gives you lemons, and it will, you must humble yourself and make the best damn lemonade you can muster. Then share it with all your friends.

So thank you! I love you.